When your last entry’s two weeks ago, something’s definitely up with your life. Either you’re a) terribly busy; b) terribly sad; c) terribly infatuated/lovestruck/crazy-to-the-point-of-rabid; or d) terribly uninspired. Guess what? I’m three of those things. Whoever gets them right wins a nibble on the ear from me. You should be excited! I nibble extremely well.
I kid. But seriously, this depresses me. Remember I paid for the maintenance of this site? I should be filling it up with entries and pictures and widgets and what-nots, not empty spaces and long gaps between posts. Ah, but zee life eez strange, eez eet not? For the past three weeks, my mistress– let’s call her “Office”– has seen more of me than my wife– let’s call her “Boarding House”– has. Not that I’m complaining about my work, but I’m just pointing out that every time I come home from a busy day in the office, there’s no time to fool around with FB, WP, and Tweetie.
That’s right. You can tick a) in your checklist. Reason for lack of entries: a career path that requires me to churn and churn and churn.
How about lack of inspiration? Is that a consideration? Yes, yes, one big mighty YES. Part of it might be justifiable because of the above-mentioned tiredness, but, ceteris paribus, the lack of a driving force is one major obstacle to writing. To put it simply: nothing comes to mind. To put it accurately: nothing comes to mind that I can transfer to this 14″ screen. Ideas are a-plenty, sure, but it fizzles out before the thought gets into my tippy-tappy fingers. I’m a few axons short of a complete synapse.
Kiddies, kindly tick b) in your checklist.
So what’s the last one going to be? Infatuation or depression? Love-craziness or sadness? (Man, the nibble’s getting extremely easy to get.)
Okay, I will admit it: I am in love. I am truly, madly, deeply in love. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t even freaking breathe because whenever I see this person, or get a text message from this person, or, OR GOD FORBID be with this person, my heart leaps to my motherfreaking throat and stays there until I die of asphyxiation or something similarly defined as suffocation.
WHERE’S MY BROWN PAPER BAG I NEED SOME AIR.
But I kid. Again. (This is so Ellen DeGeneres.) I’m not even in love– are you crazy?! But I’ve been hit. By this truck. Called “crush.” And while it’s not the knee-weakening type I’ve so elegantly described, it still packs a heavy punch. Check my entries before I left the blogosphere temporarily. The evidence is there. Of course, being the stealthy little boy that I am, I coated the words with much enigma and mystery that it’s completely possible that I’m talking about another thing entirely.
I wish I can be as open as other people.
That’s not the point, though, and I digress. The point: this crush has rendered me at a loss for words. Which is partly the reason why I disappeared in the first place. I can’t really fill this blog up, at its early stages of infancy, with lines about hope and rejection and fanaticism because that just wouldn’t be me. Or rather, that wouldn’t be realistically me. Or rather, that wouldn’t be wholly me.
Whatever. This journal-type word diarrhea has got to stop at some point, and the 570+ mark seems like a good spot to do it.
So that’s a), c), and d). Now take the hair off your face and show me that ear…
Kidding.
Ahaha. In love si parecoy! Asan na ang crush na yan. Lasingin natin.
Kakakita ko lang. I’m quitting that crush, as well.
Hey, hey, hold it up there and shut up. We do not regret paying more bucks for something we enjoy(ed) doing. Look at it this way, you paid for this and suddenly you were reminded of underutilising it. See, it also provides you a reality check – that you have been caught up with too much work, work and work.
Now, what needs to be done after realizing this, get your ass off from work and catch up with life. Make time for yourself. Start it right here. You may not get the right inspiration but just keep on writing. I challenge you to write out of nothing or at least chase those fizzling thoughts before they disappear.
Or if you hardly could, just be content with what you have decided and just move on. :)
Always the voice of reason. :)
I seem to remember you writing something similar about this predicament I’m in right now. We all have our moments, and these days, it appears I’m having mine. Don’t worry, though– as the last few entries suggest, I’m probably gonna write and write and write.
Some things are just too hard to keep.
I wonder if this is something good but I am glad that you referred to reason (instead of saying ‘always the voice of argumentations and all’), which by the way is no longer new. Hmmm, I wrote about the same predicament? Gee, how ironic that I forget more than readers do.
You didn’t write anything last night, where’s the write, write and write?
And hey, hey, if you think that some things are too hard to keep, then let me tell you that things, in general, are A LOT HARDER to let go. So you should be in good shape, relatively.
Here’s the next entry. Here’s the write, write, write. :)
In any case, your arguments are sound and fair. I would probably be scrambling all over myself trying to defend what I wrote if I thought I had a better point, but you do hit some points very much accurately. :)
Bow.