Ambitions

Last Sunday, over lunch, I told my parents and my older brother that one of my friends was going to Spain to take up her MBA. It was the same school that some of my other classmates in Ateneo went to, and it’s said to be the best business school in Europe. They then informed me that one of my “ate” in high school also went to Spain to take up her MBA, seemed to have grabbed a job there, and has now sent her parents on a Rome tour.

I became silent, and a little bit tense. I had an inkling where this conversation was going to lead to.

Why don’t you try applying for a scholarship abroad? Papa asked me. After which you can return as a the CEO of a bank, or an insurance company.

Or perhaps the governor of the BSP, Kuya chimed in.

Hmmm. I didn’t expect that response. Yes, Papa has always been vocal about sending me abroad. He believes that further success can be achieved by way of a foreign assignment. In a way, it’s understandable. We’ve always been a family of movers, nomads that travel from place to place, seeking for opportunities in lands more fertile than the last. Papa himself had begun his quest in Masbate, then travelled to Cebu with Mama, then on to Zamboanga (where I was born), and then finally finding his Ultimate in Davao. I guess it’s high time for me to find my Ultimate, which may or may not be in Makati, which may or may not be in the Philippines.

But I digress. The discussion about emigration has been tackled ad infinitum, but the CEO/governor thing gave me pause. I myself have not thought of reaching those lofty positions. I’d like to think that I have big dreams for myself, but learning that others have bigger ones for me is quite daunting. Should I be flattered because it’s one massive vote of confidence, or should I be terrified because the expectations are once again far beyond my capabilities?

It’s time to reassess my position, because I have always envisioned my future as this:

[WARNING: GEEK MODE AHEAD.]

I’ll take my final local actuarial exam in December 2011 and pass (MUST. PASS.), attaining local Fellowship by 2012, and then completely tackle the international actuarial exams by 2015. In between these sets of exams, I’ll take my insurance courses and attain two more designations. The CFA title is also swirling in there somewhere, but more important, I intend on taking my Masters degree in Financial Mathematics or Quantitative Finance. Preferably abroad, like the University of Technology in Australia. However, unless I get a scholarship, I don’t think that’s going to be quite likely, and taking time off from work to study is a pipe dream as far as I’m concerned.

In the meantime, I’ll work as Manager for whatever company I’m currently working for, then move on to foreign soil in five years’ time (just in time for my international actuarial designation). I have my eyes set on Australia or Canada. Like I mentioned to a previous boss of mine, I have no plans of working in Singapore or Hong Kong. I find that the environment there is, for lack of a better term, robotic, and I need a little flexibility in my professional life. In any case, I’ll be staying abroad for five years, then move back to the Philippines to assume a higher position. Not as high as the CEO or the BSP governor (goodness), but at the very most, the Chief Actuary of an insurance company.

[GEEK MODE ENDS.]

In two years’ time, I’ll be staying in a condominium I bought with my own money. A year after that, I will have bought a car to be used for everyday utility. Five years after that, perhaps the car of my dreams, and then within the next ten years, the condo of my dreams.

By age 28, I will have visited my uncle in Ireland. By the time I hit 30, I will have travelled the entire Southeast Asia, including China. To celebrate conquering this part of the world, I will be spending New Year 2015 in New York City with some friends, drunk as a skunk while watching the ball drop from Times Square. By age 35, I will have spent a few weeks in Europe, including Spain, where I will no longer be able to eat in the awesomeness that is El Bulli but perhaps can still visit as a form of reverence to culinary genius, and Greece, where I will have spent a few days basking in the beauty that is Santorini (and its people). Then it’s off to Maccu Picchu and Rio de Janeiro before I reach 40.

These are my dreams. These are my goals. These are my ambitions.

But the question remains: can I do it?

The honest response: I don’t know. And I don’t think I’ll ever know until I finally publish this monster of an entry that has already taken up 12 hours of my life, set my laptop aside, bring out my highlighter, pens, and book, and start scribbling my way past Chapter 5 of this voluminous Investments book.

And then perhaps I’ll have a fighting chance.

12 thoughts on “Ambitions

  1. tomsentillas says:

    Dream, and DREAM BIG, son. But you have to hitch your dreams to a the owner of fulfilled dreams, the master of our destiny, the Master Planner of the universe. Trust in Him and your dreams will come true! Your are on the right course, CEO…

  2. Goodboi says:

    It’s IESE! Isn’t it?

    This sounds right for a start, King. Tom’s right, you have to see your dream, organize it and believe that it will happen for you. :-)

  3. kerwin says:

    *awkwardness* Thanks, Fathah.

  4. kerwin says:

    Hey Goodboi, nice seeing you around these parts. :) Yes, you’re right, it’s IESE. Galing ah.

    I think that’s just what I need, a boost of confidence in myself. Easier said than done, though, I need more work. :)

  5. andi says:

    go kerwin! thanks for sharing (tho umeepal lang ata ako bigla sa blog mo, ehe). it’s a nice example you’re setting for lost and wandering souls like me. ;) God bless! pag BSP governor ka na, fwends pa rin tayo ha. hehe!

  6. kerwin says:

    Hahaha, I doubt that would ever happen, but like what my Fathah says, Dream Big, right? :P

  7. Goodboi says:

    Bien sure! I guess, we have something to share moving forward. :-)

  8. ibyangerts says:

    nice entry wing! nainspire ako hehe. sabi nga nila, libre lang mangarap, wag ng tipirin. so like, magkita na lang tayo sa greece, ok? :p

    funny lang because while you were writing this entry, about your grand dreams and traveling the world, i was ranting about a pair of shoes i wanna buy (or not buy). yan lang ang ambition ko for now. LOL.

  9. kerwin says:

    Hahaha. Sige ba, kita tayo sa Santorini, then stay tayo sa taverna while eating moussaka. LOL.

    Meron man din akong ganyang dreams. For instance, gusto ko ng Cambridge satchel. :) At Hush Puppies na brown. And iPad 3. :P

  10. citybuoy says:

    Uy, bago ulit yung template!

    I think it’s sweet that your dad has such big plans for you. These are very lovely dreams. :)

  11. kerwin says:

    Hahaha, di ko masyado feel yung previous theme. :) This seems so much fresher. :P

    Lovely? Haha. That’s one unique way of describing it.

  12. it seems so painful to have one’s life planned out so well by oneself or others. i can appreciate the chaos in my own life a bit more. salamat.

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